I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
