Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
