Can Purell be used as lube?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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