handjob tips. give me some.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize