but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize