Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Randomize
