I love black thongs
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
