Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
