I think I died a long time ago.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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