he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I need to sanitize my soul.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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