I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Actions speak louder than pants.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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