If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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