we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I'm really busy with my period
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