So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
