Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
