He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
