Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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