Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
is it fun? or sober?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
