the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
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