If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
