he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize