I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
this boner is exhausting
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
