I can tuck mytits in my pants
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
