3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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