Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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