once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
