All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
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