is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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