I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize