At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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