chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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