You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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