I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
