U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
