i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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