I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
