you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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