I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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