there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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