if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize