I should be sponsored by Trojan
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Randomize
