Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
