i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
