SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
