what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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