He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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