problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize