no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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