why didn't you poke me back
I wanna passion pit in your ass
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
