My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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